My friend told me last week, “You’re the happiest person I know. Nothing can bring you down” it’s really sad to me that my best friend of 12 years doesn’t really know me. Everyday I wake up filled with sorrow. But the thing is, I can’t tell anyone. All of my friends think my life is perfect and that I have it all together. The truth is, I’m so lonely, hurt, bitter, and utterly broken.
All I want is someone who can listen to my story of hurt and just love me the way I’ve always wanted to be loved. I’ve only had relationships where I gave my all and was tossed aside like a piece of garbage. I want someone to understand my pain and hurt and to love me unconditionally. That’s all I want in life.
I know how you feel. I really do, that explanation has to be one of the most accurate descriptions I’ve ever heard of my life.
I tried talking to someone once as well, all they said was it was it was just a ‘phase’ in life. Maybe it is. I don’t think we’ll really know, that’s something only time can reveal.
But it just feels like everyday, all I ever do is school work. Yet my grades are going down. All I want to do is be popular, yet my self-esteem prevents me from doing so. All I want is to have a friend, a boyfriend, anyone. Just to know someone cares enough to be there. To help me out in my darkest times. That’s all I want.